If you follow me on social media or YouTube, you’ll be well aware that I am in the process of getting a breast reduction surgery.
Smaller breasts is something I’ve wanted since I first needed a bra. I was one of those kids who just woke up one day with boobs. I was a pretty reserved, shy kid, so finding a bra that fit, when the B’s, C’s and D’s from my local department store back in the mid-90’s barely covered what needed covering and the bands were all so big I’d fall out the bottom felt really embarrassing. I got unwanted attention, and being at that time only around 12 years old, I didn’t even understand what people (ie. boys and men) were talking about. It wasn’t until really reflecting upon this over the past few years that I realize how much it effected me.
I remember the first time I stumbled upon a 32DD bra at LaSenza (Canada’s version of Victoria’s Secret). It was a bra that nearly, almost, kind of fit. Sure I still got a bit of a quad boob, as I’d pop out the top, and I’d have to frequently pull my boobs up so they didn’t slip out under the still too-loose band, but it was a far cry from the bras I was used to wearing!
In my teens and twenties, I was in a much smaller body. But even then, proportionally, I had a larger chest.
Now, in my 30’s (almost 40!), I’m in a much healthier space mentally and physically, however my breasts (and my body) have gotten even bigger. And after having my second child, they kind of just went out of control. I breastfed for 2 years, which was 2 years longer than I anticipated! And somehow, they just never shrunk back down to their previous size. So, the 30FF bras that used to fit pretty perfectly have now been set aside and replaced with 30H. I actually just had to undo my bra to check. I think I thought I was a G… but here I am in an H cup Curvy Kate bra.
Physically, the feeling of my breasts give me a sense of discomfort, physically and emotionally. The weight… the sweat… the underboob rashes… the feeling of just all this “stuff” around my chest… It is so uncomfortable. My shoulders and mid back hurt all the time. I actually thought for the longest time that having a constant back ache was just part of being alive, but apparently it’s not! Running is hard… but running while carrying the equivalent of a bag of flour strapped to your chest is even harder. I want to jump rope with my kids, but it just is so uncomfortable to do so. That all sucks, but the other thing that sucks emotionally is how hard it is to find clothes that fit/flatter/are comfortable for larger breasts. I obviously can make my own bras and my own clothes, but honestly… I just want to be able to buy something cute from Aerie, or wear a crop top from Old Navy that my boobs don’t entirely consume.
I’ve never had any type of surgery before besides dental surgery, so I’m not entirely sure how my body and mind will react. I have had the experience of seeing my parents both go through very serious surgeries, so I feel like I have a decent idea of how tired and out of it you are for the first little bit. After spending way too much time on the r/Reduction subreddit, I’ve decided that there is absolutely no way to predict how much help I’ll need and how my body will recover. I just need to listen to my body and accept all the help I can get.
So, that’s all the background. It’s something I wanted for the longest time, but my cup size increase after my second child really spurred me on. One of the hardest initial things to do was talk to my family doctor. Not because she isn’t patient, and understanding, and all around a wonderful human being, but because I was worried I’d be bothering her with a “trivial” issue. Let me be clear, my back pain and discomfort is not trivial, I just have this mindset that there’s always someone else worse off so I don’t want to bother people with my problems… I was relieved to hear her say that she totally agreed that I shouldn’t have to live in pain. One of the complicated parts with where I live in Ontario, is that it is fairly rural. We do have a great local hospital, but the one plastic surgeon in the area was not taking patients. So, I had to look a little farther than my home town. After doing a bit of research, I found a surgeon fairly close by who was doing consultations.
This was about two years ago, so the timeline is a little fuzzy! When I finally got in to see the surgeon, she was really receptive and kind. When she found out I sew and make sewing patterns, she was excited because she could relate a lot of what she does to what I do as a pattern maker. Her excitement about it really was motivating and also put my mind at ease. I could tell she was really passionate about her job. Parts of the consultation were uncomfortable. I had to have photos and measurements taken to be submitted to our provincial healthcare plan. I’ve been so self conscious about my size that I basically am never braless.
Within about 8 weeks or so, I found out I was approved for the surgery! Woohoo! However, this was still during Covid. There were huge backlogs in surgery dates… so my elective surgery was obviously not a huge priority.
I finally followed up again about two months ago. Their office had to submit the paperwork for insurance approval again, but it was quickly approved and I was given the option of 3 dates. I decided to go with the soonest date so that I am recovered by the time my kids are out of school and daycare for the summer. It’s a little daunting as I thought originally I’d have my mom here to help me, but unfortunately SHE had to have a very serious surgery a couple of months ago and is still not back to her normal self yet. But, I’ve enlisted the help of other family members and friends. My kids are (almost) 4 and 8. My oldest is very self sufficient. I’m a little worried about how Sparkle, my youngest, will do. She is very clingy to me, so that might be tough for a bit. But whenever I do it, it’ll be hard! So, I’m just going to do it…
The nerves about it all didn’t really set in until last weekend. I’m not so concerned about the surgery itself as the recovery and making sure my kids get to all of their places and that my husband maintains some level of sanity while also managing many of my day-to-day tasks. I’m not terribly worried about pain, but perhaps this is naive of me.
Ive started doing all of my pre surgery prep, like ordering a few surgical bras, preparing a few things to read and do while I’m relegated to the couch, meal planning, and giving the house a good clean.
Buying a surgical bra was kind of surreal. First, I was able to buy 3 bras for about $50 on amazon. I haven’t been able to buy one bra in my size for that price in ages! When I got them, and tried them on I was so excited about the prospect of being able to fit into something like that comfortably. I can get them on as I am, but I’m all kinds of popping out of them.
If you’re curious about the bras I bought, you can find them on Amazon. I felt a little overwhelmed by the task of buying a surgical bra, so I thought I’d share what I bought. I’ll be sure to add an updated after my surgery to let you all know how they faired. These are affiliate links, so if you happen to purchase one of these bras, I may receive a small commission from amazon.
I’ve been sharing my experiences over on YouTube, but if you’re not an avid youtube viewer, I’ll update here as time permits!
Thank you so much to everyone who has messaged, emailed, and commented on my posts with their experiences and well wishes. It is so reassuring to hear everyone’s stories!
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