I remember when I was a kid, my dad threw a big surprise 40th party for my mom. 40 felt so old. Now I can say from personal experience that 40 is really not that old!
For the most part, I am enjoying getting older. There are some serious stresses… raising kids, finances, responsibility… but overall I feel so much more comfortable with who I am physically and emotionally, and that accounts for a lot.
Lots of changes have happened over the past few years. Good things, like my littlest daughter, my parents both retired and I get to spend more time with them, and I made a new friend who means the world to me. But the pandemic threw a wrench into the spinning wheels of my business, and I’ve spent the past year, my 39th, trying to pick up the pieces and really consider what it is I wanted to do with my my life… And, I decided it’s this! I just want to create. Whether it’s lingerie, watercolours, crotchet, or a beautiful flower garden… I just want to make pretty things. I’m really grateful that at 40, I can make that my life. (It’s not always sunshine and roses… sometimes it’s overdraft and kraft dinner).
Anyway, I’m trying to write this while also preparing for Birthday AND Canada Day celebrations. We have a parade go right by our front door today! So I apologize if this is a little disjointed!
I wasn’t sure when to address this portion, but it is important to me to bring up today. In the spirit of Truth and Reconciliation, I would like to acknowledge that the region I am from is part of the traditional territory of the Anishinaabeg. Today is Canada Day, and indigenous history IS Canadian History. I try to take some of Canada Day to bring awareness myself and my children that we have a very complex history as white people on indigenous land.
With all of that being said, I hope everyone has a safe long weekend, whatever you are celebrating. And I hope you take a moment to check out my 40% off sale. I’ve never had a sale like this before! Shop Sewing Patterns on Etsy HERE or use code BIGBIRTHDAY here for 40% off. You can also find select items at 40% off in my Made to Order shop.
It’s been 4 weeks since my breast reduction and things are feeling pretty good around here! The first couple of days post surgery I was pretty uncomfortable, but still able to get out for walks and do most daily tasks. By about a week post surgery I was pretty much back to work!
I had my dressings taken off two weeks ago and was surprised to see how quickly my incisions closed up. I’ve never had surgery before so the whole recovery thing was brand new to me. Since I’m still healing, I’ve still got some swelling and lots more healing to do, but I am so incredibly happy with the results.
Surgery was much less scary than I had thought. The day of the surgery i felt very calm and very ready, and the hospital staff were all so kind and helpful that it really just put me at ease. I arrived at the hospital at 8am and was home by about 4 or 5. Surgery itself lasted 3-4 hours.
The best part about having the surgery is that my mid-back pain is gone. Simple tasks like chopping vegetables for dinner use to hurt my back so bad. It is completely gone now. That’s not to say I don’t have any back pain. I’m months away from turning 40… I have aches and pains, but the worst of it is gone! I can’t wait until I am able to get out running again to see how different it feels. I can’t even begin to describe how much more comfortable I feel, physically and emotionally.
I went thrifting last week and picked out a dress with a deep v-neck that I would have never been able to wear before hand. I brought it home, gave it a wash, and threw it on. It fit perfectly. I wasn’t spilling out. The fabric wasn’t straining. I didn’t have to wear some sort of modesty garment underneath. It felt amazing.
I still have to wear my post surgery bras for a few more weeks. I’m very much looking forward to the day when I can go braless. I’m also REALLY looking forward to making myself some new bras!
If you’re interested in learning more about my experience, I went over everything on YouTube
I barely had a chance to get used to the idea that Oliver wasn’t with us anymore when Lila started running a fever and my focus had to change. By Friday night she was sick to her stomach (huge red flags for FOAD kids!), and despite her insistence that she was okay, I called the metabolic specialist who suggested we take her to the hospital for fluids.
VLCADsucks. I’m just going to come out and say it. Preventative, multi-night hospital stays with a 3 year old sucks. Begging and pleading with your kid to just please eat so we can go home really sucks. It’s draining.
She ended up being diagnosed with influenza in the ER. Having my dad experience serious complications from the flu 4 years ago has imprinted on me how serious the flu can be. We get our flu shots every year, but hadn’t gotten ours yet this year. Luckily Lila’s symptoms were mild and any other kid would have been fine managing at home with the symptoms she had. But, because of her VLCAD diagnosis she needed to get on some extra fluids until she could eat again. The thing is, she is just not herself in the hospital, so I walk this tight rope of begging to take her home to see if she will eat vs. staying in the hospital for multiple days with a kid who is totally fine but just doesn’t want to eat because being in the hospital is one of the worst things ever!
On top of that, there was a labour strike within the school system which meant schools were closed and kids were supposed to be doing online work. My husband is a mechanic and this is a busy time for him (plus he just recently started this job), and truth be told, we really need the income that his job brings in right now. Me not working the way I normally would during the pandemic really took its toll on us. So I felt like I was in this no-win position…
Thankfully, we ended up getting the ok to go home on Sunday afternoon which was amazing. However, by Monday I was sick, and then on Tuesday my oldest fell sick. And let me tell you, influenza is not a joke. I scream this from the roof tops every year after seeing what my dad went through, “get your dang flu shot!” We had it mild and it’s still pretty awful. Plus, it could save a kid like Lila from spending days in the hospital.
But now, Thursday, Isabel is on the mend. I am feeling about 75% better and at least able to stay conscious for an entire work day.
It just feels like a lot sometimes. Life should only be allowed to dole you out one thing at a time. At this point, I’m not sure if I’m exhausted from fighting this virus or the emotional toll it all takes. In typical “Me” fashion, I chalk it up to me being somehow lazy and find a way to beat myself up about it.
I really struggle with Lila’s VLCAD diagnosis sometimes. We are fortunate that she has never had any symptoms and the two times she has been hospitalized, all of her bloodwork came back normal. But that throws you for a different loop as a parent. You have, on paper and what appears to be a “well” child who you are forcing to get an IV and blood draws and sit in an ER room for several hours. She was so freaked out after the IV that she wouldn’t even let anyone take her temperature under her arm. I’m still somehow hopeful that genetics will come back one day and find that her genetic mutations, both of which haven’t been seen before in any other VLCAD case, is actually benign. I don’t know if this is just me still being in denial because she always looks so well, or if there actually is hope. Regardless, I do all the things I’m supposed to… but I do worry sometimes that we are over treating her and making her scared of going to see doctors…
What I do know is that if I hear one more medical professional tell me. “All you have to do is feed her every 3 hours,” or “Just make sure she has juice when she’s sick,” I may just implode. Have you ever tried to “just” feed a toddler every 3 hours? or an infant? if they don’t want to eat, there is really no forcing them, but you as the parent have it in your head that if they don’t eat, the results could be deadly. There is no “just” doing anything with a toddler. There is not “just” a trip to the hospital for fluids. It’s an ordeal. Toddlers have this amazing way of making everything epic, for better or for worse!
When I explain the protocols for Lila’s illness to people it never sounds that bad, but it can really be an emotional challenge. While we were in the hospital, I pulled out her medical file that we carry everywhere in case she is hospitalized… in it, I had records of all of her feeds when she was an infant. Every 2-3 hours around the clock. I remember being so stressed when she wouldn’t eat after 3 hours, fearing that she would go into a metabolic crisis. And now, if she is sick and won’t eat every 3 hours, or worse, if she’s sick to her stomach, I get all of those same feelings. It’s hard trying to understand an illness as rare and complex as VLCAD. I don’t know if I need to be as stressed as I am about Lila… I hear mixed messages. From our doctors I hear she is “very mild.” And yet that doesn’t change her illness management. From the FOAD community, many of whom have lost children to these disorders will say there is no such thing as mild FOAD; that they can all lead to metabolic crisis. I’ll hear “all she needs is some fluids when she’s sick and to eat a heart healthy diet.” But what that actually looks like is much more complex (at this time in our lives anyway).
I’m eager for the day when Lila can tell me more clearly what is going on with her body and how she is feeling, and when she can understand why she needs to be eating and drinking. But at this time, it’s a struggle. I always am hesitant to share these feelings because I often get brushed off by people saying, “well at least she is well,” or “it could be worse.” And of course it could. But it also doesn’t mean that this doesn’t come without it’s challenges too, and I wish that could be acknowledged sometimes.
I’m going to leave on a high note. Here are my kiddos in their handmade halloween costume. One Yoshi and one zombie cat (which was harder to make than Yoshi)!
Little Lila-Jean arrived on the evening of July 4th! I received a call from my doctor who had some concerns (too complicated for me, not a doctor, to explain), and gave me the option of having my water broken to induce labour. I was a little nervous to do this, but decided it was the best option for the safety of my little one. So, Dan and I headed into the hospital and Isabel and the dogs went for a sleepover at my parents house. My water was broken around 6pm, just after 9 I was holding a beautiful little baby girl in my arms! It was a very quick birth, no time for an epidural, and way, way, way, WAY more painful than I remembered, but thankfully my lady-parts survived unscathed, and I was surprised to be feeling pretty amazing by the next day!
Lila was born quickly and needed a little bit of oxygen after she was born, but otherwise looked perfect as can be. She has been a pretty chill baby since day one. She took easily to breastfeeding, she settles to sleep fairly easily (other than last night! Growth spurt time), and is a total little doll.
One day old.
Everything seemed to be going swimmingly with the new baby. Isabel was adjusting nicely, and we were all starting to settle in, when we received a call from the Hospital for Sick Kids in Toronto… Every baby born is offered newborn testing for 29 (I believe) treatable illnesses. Lila screened positive for one I had never even heard of; VLCAD.
We had to head to Toronto bright and early the next day to have more testing done. I was feeling hopeful that she would come back not having this disorder. There was no history of it in our families as far as we knew and she seemed totally normal and healthy!
Lila had some blood drawn and then we waited the entire day in the lobby of Sick Kids, which is not a fun way to spend a day with a newborn… Around 5 we finally got the news we were afraid of… Lila does seem to have VLCAD, though her blood work shows that she may have a mild case. We were sent down to the emergency room to be admitted so we could start her on a special formula, and have her monitored over night.
As we were waiting in the ER to be admitted, I was given a bottle with Lila’s new formula in it. Up until this point, she had been exclusively breastfed, but she seemed to be doing ok with the bottle… that is until I noticed it was flowing a little too fast for her. I pulled the bottle away and went to burp her when she went completely limp and unresponsive. When you’re at sick kids, in the ER with an unresponsive infant the medical response is… quick and dramatic. We were rushed into a room where she was placed on a table, hooked to an IV and other monitoring equipment. She quickly regained consciousness, but it was the most terrifying moments of my life. I need to say, the staff at the hospital were all amazing, but that day was a very traumatic experience. Not only was I still hormonal after having only given birth a week or so prior, sleep deprived and dealing with the shock of an unexpected diagnosis, my baby… my brand new baby went floppy and unconscious before my eyes. They determined that the episode was likely unrelated to her VLCAD diagnosis, and most likely she “choked” (my word) on the formula. She’s been totally fine ever since, but it was so incredibly scary.
I’m not even going to try to explain VLCAD in my own words, so I’ll quote from the newborn screening website:
Very long-chain acyl-CoA dehydrogenase deficiency (VLCAD) is a rare, inherited (genetic) disease. Babies with VLCAD cannot make certain fats into energy, especially during long periods without food (fasting). Babies can get very sick if they cannot make fats into energy when needed. Without treatment, minor illnesses and fasting can cause life-threatening episodes called metabolic crises.
We just recently got the results of Lila’s enzyme test which shows she does have the ability to breakdown some very long chain fats, but not entirely. The metabolic team we are working with consider her case mild, which I am so incredibly grateful for. We are still waiting for more genetic testing to be done to get more specific information.
There is no “cure” for VLCAD, but the treatment in our case is fairly simple on the surface. We just have to feed her every 2-3 hours (and we just go the ok to let her sleep 4 hours overnight between feeds). The tricky part is that we have to combination feed. She gets a small bottle of special formula, then breastfeeds. She tends to feel full-ish after a bottle so waits a bit before breastfeeding, so I often feel like I’m just feeding her around the clock. We have to keep a chart of all of her feeds. If she gets sick and can’t eat or keep food down, we have to take her to the hospital for iv fluids.
This diagnosis and the trips to Sick Kids has really taken a lot out of us. When she first was tested, we had to treat her as though she had a severe form of the illness… just in case! It all seemed so very serious. And it has the potential to be, but it is much more manageable than we had thought. As Lila gets older, she will be able to go longer and longer between meals. She will grow up a totally normal kid. We just will have to be cautious when she is sick, and make sure she has a snack before being active.
The world of metabolic disorders is all so new to me. We are so incredibly fortunate to be able to work with the metabolic team at Sick Kids in Toronto. They are absolutely amazing.
So… As you can see, it’s been a pretty hectic month. But, I feel like we’re starting to settle into a bit of a routine these days. I’m getting accustomed to the feeding schedule and juggling two kids (and two dogs… honestly the dogs are more work). Lila is seriously an amazing baby, she makes it pretty easy. And Isabel is such a helpful big sister, I’m not sure where I’d be without her… and Dan. Dan is in charge of formula and making sure I wake up to feed her at night and staying calm when I am losing it and assuring me everything will be fine.
Sisters.
To add just a little bit of extra drama to our already scary month, last Friday as I was walking into the house with the two girls, I tripped on a loose board on our walkway and fell while carrying Lila in her carseat. Isabel immediately freaked out because I had spilled the contents of the diaper bag. I freaked out because I had dropped my 3 week old baby, and Lila mostly just sat there and looked perplexed. Falling with a newborn, whether she’s buckled into a care seat or not, is pretty much the worst thing ever. She seemed totally ok, but I didn’t want to risk it. I took her into the after hours clinic near our house to get her checked out and of course she was totally fine… This visit made me realize though, that I need to be an expert on Lila’s condition. I mentioned to the doctor (who was amazing!) that she has VLCAD, and I had to explain it to her the best I could. No slight against the doctor of course, there is a reason why doctors specialize. It just was a reminder for me that what we are dealing with is rare and I have to make sure I am well educated so I can advocate for the best care for her.
And before you ask, yes, I am also ok! A little bruised, but Isabel fixed me up with some Finding Nemo bandaids.
I’m hoping that we got all of our drama out of the way in July and can now settle down into a boring, event free August. I have a couple of patterns that I am eager to work on and release soon – my nursing bra expansion pack as well as maternity undies. I also just realized I never released a couple of my harness/vest patterns… I had hoped to get back to taking some lingerie orders sooner rather than later, but with the insanity of the last month I’m going to give myself some time to rest before getting back to work…
Isabel made a semi-last minute costume decision. Originally she wanted to be a witch, but she’s been watching Teen Titans Go with her Dad and decided Raven was a way cooler costume.
I figured it would be easy enough, and the sewing was! I used a basic gymnastics leotard pattern for the bodysuit, some plain grey leggings, and made the belt and “gem” closure out of glittery foam from the dollar store.
Finding purple fabric for the cape turned out to be ridiculous! I have two large fabric shops near me and neither of them had anything except for purple broadcloth or really over-priced velvet. I ended up ordering some neoprene from fabric.com which ended up being perfect for the cape!
I took the picture and just moments after she fell in the dirt and got her costume dirty, which lead to a full blown melt down. She insisted she didn’t want me to clean the costume, she just wanted it to be the way it was before! It’s tough being 4!
Speaking of being 4, we just celebrated her birthday. She’s really into LOL Dolls (I know, the over packaging is terrible), so we did an LOL Theme. Isabel was able to help me out putting stickers on glittery stars that we cut out and hung up around the house. I made big LOL doll cut outs that were ridiculously fun to make. I used a projector to trace the shapes on foam core then painted them with acrylic paint. I made one of them with removable clothes and accessories that attach with with velcro, which we used to play “pin the clothes on Curious QT.”
I’m really loving this age. She’s so funny and has lots of fun ideas. She decided she wanted a bubblegum cake, so I made a trusty old boxed cake with buttercream frosting with a little bit of bubblegum flavouring in it. Not such a hit for me as I’m more of a chocolate cake girl, but Isabel loved it!
Funny enough, despite the piñata, cake, treats, and games, the kids favourite thing was doing a colouring contest. We ended up doing three rounds! My favourite thing that I made was the party favours. I made bath bombs with surprises inside. I have to admit, my first attempt was a total fail. I added too much liquid and the bath bombs just kept expanding. So I started from scratch and the second round worked perfectly!
Occasions like these make me so glad I’m crafty and have some basic photoshop skills. Pretty much all of the basic supplies are dollar store purchases that I was able to craft into something fun and cool. I re-use a lot of our decorations each year too. I hate hoarding too much “stuff” so I always try to make the most of it.
I really love this time of year because it gives me lots of time to do crafty things that aren’t lingerie related. Between birthday parties, Halloween, and making Christmas gifts, I have lots of opportunities to make different things…
Which leads me to my question for you. What are your favourite things to make for holiday gifts? Slippers, sleep masks, and make-up bags are always a go-to for me. For Isabel, I always make her clothes and little stuffed toys. Any suggestions for projects I should try this year? What’s on your holiday “to make” list?
October is just the best month! We celebrate Thanksgiving here in Canada, which is my favourite meal of the year, it’s my beautiful daughter’s birthday which always means lots of fun crafting, celebrating and cake, and it’s Halloween!
I just love this time of year. I love the shorter days and cooler weather… and I love all of the spooky stories and folklore that go along with the season. I get to indulge a little extra in my love for all things creepy and paranormal. It’s just a time of year where I feel like celebrating. But low-key celebrating.
I always run a bit of a sale around Halloween. If you’re like me, I like to do lots of sewing this time of year so it’s a good time to stock up on patterns. So, in my pattern shop, everything is marked down by 15%. No coupon needed in my Etsy shop, but if you’re shopping here, use coupon code TrickOrTreat at checkout.
In my lingerie shop, I’m doing free shipping on sleep masks and hair accessories!
Over the past few months I’ve worked on a few fun custom orders as well as a little sewing for myself. I just finished up Halloween Costumes as well as a few halloween dresses for Isabel which I’ll show you a little later. Isabel initially wanted to be a witch this year, which I was pretty excited about, but she changed her mind a couple of weeks ago and decided to be Raven from Teen Titans Go. I just finished up the cloak today and it turned out pretty good despite a little bit of my disappointment… At the same time I’m excited that she is beginning to develop her own interests and assert her own personality! And she was absolutely adorable when she tried her costume on.
I made this swimsuit for myself at the end of August. My cousin just put in a pool at her house and Isabel and I were down there pretty much every weekend. I used my Jasmine Bra pattern to create the top. It’s made with sew in foam padding and criss-cross straps at the back. The bottoms are my Ava Pattern, with ties instead of adjustable straps. This look was pretty easy to create. If you check out my tutorials on sewing swimwear finishes as well as how to add padding to the Jasmine Bra, you’ll be able to recreate a similar effect.
I’ve been using up all of my bits of too precious to get rid of lace to create this little pouches for my silk scrunchies. I seriously love these bags. I’ve used everything from wide venice lace to embroidered mesh.
I sent out this pretty peach bralette for a customer last month. I’m really into neutral bras and I love how this came together.
The same customer also requested a lace choker. I added a small silver o-ring to the front and a silver clasp at the back.
And… Just last week I sent out this adorable pair! I used up every last bit of this pretty autumn-inspired fabric. I just love the little mushrooms. I hope the recipient loves them as much as I do!
Now that the weather has really started getting cooler (we woke up to snow on the ground this morning), I’ve got my heart set on making a couple french terry sweatshirts, thermal Hunter Panties with matching Jasmine Bras, some silk lounge pants, and silk pillow cases for myself.
I love the fall. Time for cozy sweaters, warm scarves, hot drinks, pumpkin pie, halloween, ghost stories, Thanksgiving… all of my favourite things. This year it also meant getting ready for Isabel’s first year of school! I can hardly believe it. In some ways she already seems so grown up and I know she’s doing great in school, but in other ways I just can’t believe that my baby is so independent. Look at this fierce little woman ready to take on the world! For her first day, I made her a little narwhal print tunic and hologram spandex leggings. She paired them with yellow rubber boots and I can tell she felt like a million bucks! hehe… I just love this kid.
The transition to school has been pretty painless for us. The hours are similar to what our daycare hours were, and she finds taking the school bus exciting. I’m enjoying not having to pay for daycare, but am missing some of the flexibility that home daycare provides! I have to admit, I still go to Isabel’s daycare now and then for a puppy play!!! We’ve been so lucky to have really amazing women provide care for Isabel. If you are a daycare worker, you do amazing work!
Our new puppy is pretty much full grown I think. She’s about 9 months old now and just slightly smaller than Oliver, our monster pug, but much thinner. I suspect she’ll fill out over the next little while. She’s a real sweetie, very smart and great with kids! My one challenge with her is a new one that has come up over the last few weeks, and that’s being over protective while she’s on a leash. She doesn’t like people getting too close and puts on a big show. My mom recently adopted a rescued french bulldog who is about 2 or 3 years old and a total sweetheart. She and Leah get along so well. It’s hilarious to see the two of them run around and play together. Oliver has really slowed down a lot over the last year and a half, but he’s holding steady. Leah follows him around the house and is constantly trying to snuggle with him, which he allows, reluctantly.
This summer has been a weird one. We had so many out of the ordinary things happen, like a huge tree coming down, our car blowing up (figuratively)… and I feel like there was something else but I forget what it is now. We spent so many weekends either chopping up trees and stacking wood, or my husband fixing the car and I trying to entertain Isabel, that we didn’t get to any of the projects we wanted to this summer like painting the deck and garage… And Isabel had a lot of time off throughout the summer which meant I had a lot of time away from work… I feel like all summer, whether in my personal life or work life, I’ve just been constantly playing catch-up.
That being said, we did fit in a lot of fun things, like a trip to Canada’s Wonderland, we got to watch turtles hatch just down the road from our house, and spent lots of time in my cousins new pool.
Now that Isabel is basically off to fend for herself on the school yard, it’s really set my biological clock ticking. I have so much anxiety and worry over whether I’ll be able to have another baby. I’ve felt a lot of uncertainty in my life, but this uncertainty is one of the worst because it’s so primal and out of my control. I’m at the mercy of my own body. Added onto this is the fact that my brother really seems to have dropped off the radar once again. I want that “normal” adult sibling relationship and it just seems I’ll never have it. Relationships are hard.
I’ve got a few new patterns still to release. I’m not sure why, I’m feeling a lot of apprehension and anxiety around it and keep putting it off. What if there’s a mistake? What if people don’t like it? I feel like because I’ve been out of the work-loop for most of the summer, my creative confidence has taken a bit of a hit. I’ve been here before, many times in fact, and I’ll be here in this headspace again. I know I need to acknowledge it, then fight against these feelings because they’re not true!
I also am eagerly awaiting a shipment of fabric in anticipation of cooler weather. I’m planning on releasing a number of ready made pieces in the lead-up to Christmas. I know that my made to order turn around can make it tricky for gift giving, so I’m hoping this will help those of you who want to give the gift of comfortably, ethically made underwear!
I’ve also added a handful of new scrunchies to my shop. I am obsessed with these, and the black in particular is a hot seller! In addition to the silk, I’ve included my signature red and black buffalo plaid flannel as a scrunchie. I’ll be restocking my buffalo plaid lingerie pieces soon, so now you can really coordinate from ponytail to underwear!
Tomorrow is the big day… Canada Day and my birthday!
This year feels like a big one. Thirty Five. 35.
Thirty Five is the year that your doctor informs you that your fertility is quickly declining and you are becoming of advanced maternal age. I joke, of course, but I have to admit I’m feeling the pressure of aging despite the fact that I also feel in the best physical health of my life. I’m active, I’m running, I’m feeling pretty good! But I’m also struggling with certain things, like a recent diagnosis of PCOS (polycystic ovarian syndrome) which is causing me to worry about my weight (needlessly, but it is a constant source of anxiety for me) and of course that constant question of whether or not I will (or can) have another baby.
This is a question I never considered. When I finally decided that we would have one child, I thought that would be it. It wasn’t until the last year or so that I really started thinking honestly about having a second. I love my life right now. Isabel is amazing and I can’t imagine life with another one of her running around. I’ve talked a lot about my thoughts on only having one child, but I’ve had some things happen in my personal life lately that have me reconsidering…
Stressing about grown up stuff is no fun… fertility worries, a new car payment, Isabel starting school, plus my usual neuroses has had me all out of sorts. When I get in these slumps I find it so hard to focus on any specific task. I’ve been in the process of revamping my Grace & Bambi Patterns, two of my very first patterns, but I have had such a hard time just keeping my thought process running in a straight line that it’s taking me much longer than usual. My creativity runs like a fast flowing stream with millions of little tributaries running off in all directions… One thing leads to something else, which leads to another thing, which ends in nothing ever getting done.
So, I’m trying to get back to what I did two years ago, when I was in one of the deepest depths of my depression and anxiety… allowing myself time to do the things I like. Making new things when the inspiration hits. Taking pretty pictures. Eating chocolate cake. Picking wildflowers. Making the time to run or do yoga. And writing.
I’m also taking vacation for the first time since Isabel was born (she’s almost 4!). We’re going camping, just for two nights, but I’m looking forward to disconnecting and spending a few days in the woods.
And of course I’m running my annual Birthday Sale! Pretty much everything is 20% off. No coupon necessary in my Etsy Shops, but you can use coupon code Birthday20 to purchase patterns directly on my website. Sale ends July 4th!
Can I tell you about the difficult month I’ve had? Actually, it’s been a couple of months. First, our roof leaked which led to a huge unexpected home repair. Always stressful right?
I don’t talk about this much, but I have a brother who has had some pretty serious struggles with addiction and lately things have been very stressful with him. Anyone who has loved someone with an addiction will know how hard it is. I don’t want to get into details, but all I want to say is my heart hurts and it is a constant roller coaster ride and it takes up a lot of my emotional energy worrying about him (and my parents).
I had an ultrasound a few weeks ago that found some sort of “mass” on my uterus, so that’s fun. I’m sure it’s nothing but of course my brain goes to the worst case scenario. Bodies are the worst, right?
Then, we had a huge wind storm that knocked a gigantic, and I mean GIGANTIC tree down. It actually lifted up right from the roots. Luckily it ended up falling onto another tree just before landing on our brand new, very expensive roof. Nevertheless, cutting it down wasn’t a job that we could do… So we had a tree guy come out, who spent half the day slowly removing it. But we were left with a lot of wood which we’ve spent the last few weeks chopping, stacking, and trying to desperately give away! We have enough for bon fires for ages… On the bright side, I do like roasted marshmallows and now my backyard gets a lot more sun!
In the midst of this, we bought a car. “Old Goldie” as we affectionately called our 2002 Honda CR-V, was on her last legs and we knew it was just a matter of time before she literally fell apart (oh the rust). So we found a good deal on a new car, less than a decade old which for us is like living in the future. Gosh, this car is beautiful. However, driving back from puppy class last week it stalled on the highway and refused to start. I was stuck on the side of the highway with an overtired 3 year old and a wound-up puppy. Turns out, somehow a teeny tiny piece of cigarette foil (ugh… cigarettes. Could they be any worse?) got stuck where the engine air filter should have been (oops) and caused some kind of problem that Dan explained to be very calmly. Anyway, at the end of the day my genius husband (who is a mechanic) fixed it and saved us a tow. But it was stressful after the couple of weeks I’ve had.
So… I’ve been stressed. Ahh… It actually feels good just to let that all out.
I also have a ton of projects that are half started that I need to focus on and complete. I often have so many ideas and I get so excited about each of them that I start them, move on, then never finish them. Right now I’ve got 4 patterns on the go, a really exciting collaboration with another lingerie designer in the works, another top secret project, an art project… all of them started, none of them completed. Oh yeah, and I guess I better file my taxes (again, started that, but never finished). As much as I enjoy starting these projects (not taxes), it stresses me out having so many things half done. Why do I do this to myself?
I did manage to almost complete a couple of things. I posted about my Supply De-Stash yesterday. So many things have already sold out! Thank you every one who visited the sale, I hope you found something special and I can’t wait to see how you use them!
The other thing I’ve almost completed is a One of a Kind Lingerie (and more) Sale! I’ve been wanting to list these pieces for a while. Some of them I’m having a hard time with the idea of letting go, particularly the pastel satin set, but these one of a kind pieces deserve to be loved and worn, not just tucked away in a box.
A couple years ago, my friend Susie was trying out selling some items in her salon. I made up a few pouches and make-up bags, and I had a few left over so I’ll be posting those soon. I kept a few for myself and Isabel to use as pencil cases, but I’ve got more pouches than I can use. I really love these!
Some of my one of a kind pieces are prototypes, others are custom orders that I realized before shipping to the customer that I made them wrong. Oops. This is something my scatter brain does way too often than I’d like to admit. I just get so excited to jump in that I sometimes overlook details… the bra below was one of those oopsies. It was supposed to have black lace…
Other pieces, like this harness, are pieces that just didn’t quite make the cut into a collection. I also have a couple of slightly flawed pieces. Every once and a while I’ll finish a bra or a sleep mask then promptly cut a hole in the lining… sigh…
Here’s to pretty new lingerie, and hopefully some better luck for me (pretty, pretty please). Although I woke up this morning to find a puddle of water under my fridge… so if you need me, I may be out fridge shopping…
When I brought home Oliver 10 years ago I was living alone in Toronto. I had a beautiful corner apartment on Eglinton Avenue with lovely old hardwood floors and black and white tiled bathroom. I had just broken up with my live-in boyfriend and was on my own. It wasn’t my first time living on my own in the city, but it was the first time I felt like I was really doing it on my own. I’m pretty proud of that time of my life.
Oliver very quickly became the absolute love of my life. How can you not fall in love with a little pug-baby? That squishy face is only topped by his hilarious personality. That dog went everywhere with me.
Oliver and I have been through so much together. We’ve been through really hard times… Really, really shitty things. We’ve also done really fun things. Road trips, hikes, camping trips (not his favourite), Christmas dinners, my wedding… He has just been the best companion.
Over the last year Oliver has really started to show his age. It breaks my heart to even consider the fact that one day I’m going to wake up and he’s not going to be there to greet me with a snort and a sneeze. That’s the worst part about dogs. You know that one day they won’t be able to be with you any more.
I now have to carry him up and down stairs, carry him outside to go pee, and follow him around the house looking for accidents since the poor guy can’t seem to control his hind end anymore. I don’t mind the extra work, but I hate to see his body failing. It breaks my heart.
Isabel turned 3 in October. I can’t believe she’ll be starting school in the fall. This is about the time most parents start thinking about adding a second child to their family. We think about it. I think about it a lot. The truth is, it took a long time for Isabel to come into this world, and although I wouldn’t say we’re “trying” (more like, “trying to not care about trying”) I’m skeptical that a second babe is in our future…
Kids aren’t something I thought I’d ever have. I always pictured myself independent, on my own, more of the “cool aunt” type. But Isabel is my life and I’m so glad I decided to give parenthood a try. A second baby would be warmly welcomed but I’m also 100% happy with how life is now. More so, I feel concern for Isabel. Any parent, or prospective parent knows, the pressure you feel from the world, from unwanted advice, always makes you question your abilities and choices. I always hear, “You can’t only have one!” and “I know an only-child and she has so many issues!” (Full disclosure: the only-children I know are all wildly successful individuals who I really admire. My best friend growing up, my cousin who is like my sister, a friend of my husband who is a wicked mom and runs an art gallery…) Although I’m happy with Isabel, who is my life and my world, I worry that she’ll be missing out on having a sibling.
This leads me to Leah.
I had been wanting a puppy for a while and am always researching breeds and checking out shelters, but I was concerned about how a puppy would get on with Oliver, who has mobility issues and is generally a grump around other dogs. But when we saw some Boston Terrier/Pug mix puppies come up locally we decided to jump at the opportunity.
Sure, a puppy isn’t a substitute for a sibling, but I know from experience that dogs are the best companion anyone could ask for. And I know that Olivers time is coming… maybe not for a while, but it’s on the horizon, and I’m not sure how I’d get out of bed if not for a little wet nose nudging me out for a walk.
So here she is! Little Leah. Isabel named her. She’s pretty sweet… 3/4 boston and 1/4 pug. She’s a lazy little thing who has quick bursts of energy. She’s funny, incredibly snuggly and loves to be carried. I’m looking forward to the bitey-puppy stage to come to an end, but I’m enjoying the puppy snuggles. Oliver is doing pretty good, although Leah really wishes he would play with her. I often catch them snuggling together during nap time. She’s a smart little thing and already knows how to “sit” though potty training is going a little slow… We start some training classes soon.
The puppy has made things a little extra busy around here but I’m fortunate enough to be home all day with her most days. She has settled in really well to our little family. I’m looking forward to spring and teaching her to run with me.
We use cookies on our website to give you the most relevant experience by remembering your preferences and repeat visits. By clicking “Accept All”, you consent to the use of ALL the cookies. However, you may visit "Cookie Settings" to provide a controlled consent.
This website uses cookies to improve your experience while you navigate through the website. Out of these, the cookies that are categorized as necessary are stored on your browser as they are essential for the working of basic functionalities of the website. We also use third-party cookies that help us analyze and understand how you use this website. These cookies will be stored in your browser only with your consent. You also have the option to opt-out of these cookies. But opting out of some of these cookies may affect your browsing experience.
Necessary cookies are absolutely essential for the website to function properly. These cookies ensure basic functionalities and security features of the website, anonymously.
Cookie
Duration
Description
cookielawinfo-checkbox-analytics
11 months
This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Analytics".
cookielawinfo-checkbox-functional
11 months
The cookie is set by GDPR cookie consent to record the user consent for the cookies in the category "Functional".
cookielawinfo-checkbox-necessary
11 months
This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. The cookies is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Necessary".
cookielawinfo-checkbox-others
11 months
This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Other.
cookielawinfo-checkbox-performance
11 months
This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Performance".
viewed_cookie_policy
11 months
The cookie is set by the GDPR Cookie Consent plugin and is used to store whether or not user has consented to the use of cookies. It does not store any personal data.
Functional cookies help to perform certain functionalities like sharing the content of the website on social media platforms, collect feedbacks, and other third-party features.
Performance cookies are used to understand and analyze the key performance indexes of the website which helps in delivering a better user experience for the visitors.
Analytical cookies are used to understand how visitors interact with the website. These cookies help provide information on metrics the number of visitors, bounce rate, traffic source, etc.
Advertisement cookies are used to provide visitors with relevant ads and marketing campaigns. These cookies track visitors across websites and collect information to provide customized ads.
