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A big sale for a big birthday

Personal, Sales July 1, 2023

This is a big one. I’m turning 40!

I remember when I was a kid, my dad threw a big surprise 40th party for my mom. 40 felt so old. Now I can say from personal experience that 40 is really not that old!

For the most part, I am enjoying getting older. There are some serious stresses… raising kids, finances, responsibility… but overall I feel so much more comfortable with who I am physically and emotionally, and that accounts for a lot.

Lots of changes have happened over the past few years. Good things, like my littlest daughter, my parents both retired and I get to spend more time with them, and I made a new friend who means the world to me. But the pandemic threw a wrench into the spinning wheels of my business, and I’ve spent the past year, my 39th, trying to pick up the pieces and really consider what it is I wanted to do with my my life… And, I decided it’s this! I just want to create. Whether it’s lingerie, watercolours, crotchet, or a beautiful flower garden… I just want to make pretty things. I’m really grateful that at 40, I can make that my life. (It’s not always sunshine and roses… sometimes it’s overdraft and kraft dinner).

Anyway, I’m trying to write this while also preparing for Birthday AND Canada Day celebrations. We have a parade go right by our front door today! So I apologize if this is a little disjointed!

I wasn’t sure when to address this portion, but it is important to me to bring up today. In the spirit of Truth and Reconciliation, I would like to acknowledge that the region I am from is part of the traditional territory of the Anishinaabeg. Today is Canada Day, and indigenous history IS Canadian History. I try to take some of Canada Day to bring awareness myself and my children that we have a very complex history as white people on indigenous land.

With all of that being said, I hope everyone has a safe long weekend, whatever you are celebrating. And I hope you take a moment to check out my 40% off sale. I’ve never had a sale like this before! Shop Sewing Patterns on Etsy HERE or use code BIGBIRTHDAY here for 40% off. You can also find select items at 40% off in my Made to Order shop.

Birthday Time

New Items, Personal, Sales June 30, 2018

Has it really been another year already?

Tomorrow is the big day… Canada Day and my birthday!

This year feels like a big one. Thirty Five. 35.

Thirty Five is the year that your doctor informs you that your fertility is quickly declining and you are becoming of advanced maternal age. I joke, of course, but I have to admit I’m feeling the pressure of aging despite the fact that I also feel in the best physical health of my life. I’m active, I’m running, I’m feeling pretty good! But I’m also struggling with certain things, like a recent diagnosis of PCOS (polycystic ovarian syndrome) which is causing me to worry about my weight (needlessly, but it is a constant source of anxiety for me) and of course that constant question of whether or not I will (or can) have another baby.

This is a question I never considered. When I finally decided that we would have one child, I thought that would be it. It wasn’t until the last year or so that I really started thinking honestly about having a second. I love my life right now. Isabel is amazing and I can’t imagine life with another one of her running around. I’ve talked a lot about my thoughts on only having one child, but I’ve had some things happen in my personal life lately that have me reconsidering…

Stressing about grown up stuff is no fun… fertility worries, a new car payment, Isabel starting school, plus my usual neuroses has had me all out of sorts.  When I get in these slumps I find it so hard to focus on any specific task. I’ve been in the process of revamping my Grace & Bambi Patterns, two of my very first patterns, but I have had such a hard time just keeping my thought process running in a straight line that it’s taking me much longer than usual. My creativity runs like a fast flowing stream with millions of little tributaries running off in all directions… One thing leads to something else, which leads to another thing, which ends in nothing ever getting done.

So, I’m trying to get back to what I did two years ago, when I was in one of the deepest depths of my depression and anxiety… allowing myself time to do the things I like. Making new things when the inspiration hits. Taking pretty pictures. Eating chocolate cake. Picking wildflowers. Making the time to run or do yoga. And writing.

I’m also taking vacation for the first time since Isabel was born (she’s almost 4!). We’re going camping, just for two nights, but I’m looking forward to disconnecting and spending a few days in the woods.

And of course I’m running my annual Birthday Sale! Pretty much everything is 20% off. No coupon necessary in my Etsy Shops, but you can use coupon code Birthday20 to purchase patterns directly on my website. Sale ends July 4th!

It’s my birthday… sale.

Anxiety, Lingerie, Sales, Sewing Patterns June 30, 2017

Happy birthday to me… happy birthday to me!

My birthday really snuck up on me this year. I guess that’s what happens when you get older. Sigh…

33 has been a pretty good year. Well actually, it was difficult. 33 was the year I got help for my anxiety ‘issue.’ It’s kind of funny, because I am ending out 33 doing not quite so well, but during this year I’ve learned so many things about how to maintain my sanity. Most importantly I learned that I don’t have to feel like something terrible is about to happen all of the time.

On the bright side, I sleep now! And I very rarely have nightmares. I did have a bout of sleep paralysis/wake-up screaming two nights ago, but as a whole, my sleep is much better. However, my bouts of nightmares really make me feel like a crazy person. There is no nice way to put it. They are terrifying and the feelings linger for days. Actually, when I think of it, a lot of my intrusive thoughts as well as my dreams leave me feeling like, “a good/normal person wouldn’t have these thoughts. There is something wrong with me.” It’s not a good feeling to have, on top of the effect of the imagery and content of my dreams and intrusive thoughts. I feel embarrassed sharing this, but I know there is probably at least one other person out there who feels the same way!

My physical health is much better. I’m running 10k on a regular basis and planning on training for 15! On the downside, I’m finding that my mental health maintenance is lacking… I’ve really let it slip and it’s showing. My body images has also been not so good – this is a thing I still don’t feel I have a good grasp on. But as a whole, I am doing much better.

Life is full of highs and lows and lots of stuff in between. It’s the “in between” times that I have a hard time with, and summer is always one of those times for me. Things drag along a little more slowly, which I should enjoy, but I thrive off of the adrenaline rush of being busy (or of crisis). I’m trying… really trying to be ok with life just chugging a long.

Anyway, enough about me…

I decided to celebrate, I’d have a sale, and it’s going to be my BIGGEST sale of the year. Take 20% off all lingerie & sewing patterns with the coupon code HappyBirthday 20. Offer expires Monday July 3 at midnight!

Shop Lingerie on Etsy

Shop Sewing Patterns on Etsy

Or, shop directly on my blog!

I thought this might be a good time for a sale since it’s a long weekend for many of us, with Canada Day and July 4th in the US. This is a great opportunity to pick up a couple sewing patterns and work through my new swimsuit tutorials *wink wink*

And YES! I ate that giant brownie.

Enjoy!

This Silence Has Been Brought To You By Anxiety

Personal, Uncategorized July 8, 2016

I’ve been distant. Quiet. I know.

The truth is I’ve been going through something. All my life I’ve been considered a “worrier.” If you were to ask any of my friends, they’d probably say I have a lot of stress, much of it self imposed, and kind of on the irrational (ok, crazy)  side. I’ve been finding over the last couple of years,  culminating in the last several months, that my anxiety levels have been getting to a point that is crippling.

All of my life I’ve believed that if I just powered through, kept moving, I could get past the uncomfortable feelings. I recently came to the quiet revelation that I’ve been doing mental health all wrong and that maybe my constant feeling of dread and worry wasn’t normal, especially when things are generally ok.

The turning point for me was releasing this last pattern collection. I’ve been so worried that things aren’t good enough, that people will be disappointed, that something is wrong, that I’ve been terrified to write about them. I need to work on a new collection for my lingerie shop, which is looking rather ragged, but I have the feeling that nothing will ever be good enough.  I open my email with dread and some days can’t even bring myself to check because I’m afraid that something is wrong. I have no reason to feel this way. I am a good designer. I’ve worked hard to build a fairly successful business.

Thinking about these feelings made me realize how afraid I was for Isabel, and my compulsive need to make sure she is ok. My irrational worries that she will get out of her crib, through her locked door, past the baby gate, down the stairs, out of our locked house, and come to some terrible end out in the world. It’s a terrible feeling to constantly have with you.

Since buying this new house, my anxiety has shot through the roof. I feel like there is a lot of “unknown” which is really terrifying for me. I have constant stress over finances when I really don’t need to. I have constant stress over the state of our house, when reality is I live in a beautiful old home that much of the major work has been completed. When I sit and think rationally about my anxieties, none of them make sense, but I just can’t stop. I almost constantly have that tight feeling in my chest, like the way you feel before writing a big test that you’re not quite prepared for. I wake up this way, and when I do fall asleep, I have stressful dreams.

Mix all this with an unhealthy dose of intrusive thoughts, and I decided that maybe something wasn’t firing quite right and that I needed some help. As someone who DIY’s everything, saying this was a big step is a bit of an understatement.

I always thought my Anxiety was a mixed blessing. Sure, it stopped me from sleeping or actually getting to know any of the many amazing people in my life, but it compelled me to work, work, work! In hindsight, none of my best work has been done in periods of high anxiety. It’s not a good motivator and it’s definitely not good for business. In fact, it’s been crippling my business over the last few months.

So, I’m trying something new. I’ve been doing self care things for months, like exercise, but it hasn’t been cutting it. I’ve been getting a lot of new insight into the way I think over the last week and it’s really been a revelation. I’ve started on some medication, picked up yoga again, started a “worry journal” (which sounds lame but feels helpful),  have enrolled in some support groups and hopefully will have some one-on-one care soon. Unfortunately, there is a wait list for mental health care in our area, so that has been frustrating for me, but it feels good to be getting help.

I wanted to write this to explain a little to you what’s been going on with me. I haven’t been myself for a while now. I’ve always wanted this blog to be a place where I can share real life: it’s good times and it’s not so good times…  I hate that persona that people put online where thing are 100% perfect 100% of the time #bestlife #blessed. Reaching out for help was extremely difficult for me, and I want anyone know is going through something similar to know it’s ok! We would never judge a friend who is going through these things, so I don’t know why we judge ourselves so harshly.

Thanks for listening, and mostly, thanks for caring about me. If anyone has any similar experiences, I’d love to hear.

Getting (more) settled

Uncategorized February 12, 2016

I’m really starting to feel at home in the new house and I am really loving our new community! It is so welcoming and so very quiet.

We’re slowly working on re-doing the kitchen right now. It’s got the original cabinets, counters and floors. We’re currently waiting on our new flooring to arrive. I can’t wait to get it put down. Our current tile is in rough condition, looks terrible, and is impossible to clean. And as anyone who has bought and renovated an old house, old tile can be made of scary things. I just want it gone.

We had a very hard time deciding what to do about the flooring and eventually decided on vinyl planks. Let’s face it, the carrara marble I really wanted just isn’t in the budget right now (hah! the handmade lingerie business is not that lucrative).  Our house is older and has some lumpy floors and we didn’t want to have to go through the trouble or laying a new subfloor right now, so I think the vinyl will be a cost-effective, durable, and easy way to spruce the place up.

Right now, we’re (actually I am) painting our cabinets, adding new hardware and changing out old light fixtures.  It’s looking good, but the process is so slow. Painting cabinets is so much cheaper than buying new ones, but it isn’t a quick weekend project. Anyone who tells you otherwise is a liar, plain and simple!! It is a process of removing hardware, washing with TSP, sanding, priming, painting, then waiting several days for the paint to cure. Of course, all of our hardware had years of paint build up on them. If you are going to paint cabinets, please, please, please, remove the hardware first!

If you plan on painting cabinets, prepare for weeks of total chaos

 It’s coming together though! I’ve polished up the old chrome trim along the counter top and we painted the ceiling too.

I’m currently on the look out for some art for the breakfast nook and something interesting to display on the glass shelves in the window above the sink. At my grandmas house she had pretty glass perfume bottles that looked so beautiful in the sunlight. I was thinking of trying to find some antique glass bottles, or possibly some pretty rocks and crystals. I don’t think I’ve ever brought this up before, but I love rocks! Not in a “crystal healing” way but in a “geology is awesome” way. 
I’ve also been working hard trying to clean up our old Heartland Stove. It was/is very, very dirty. I’m very conflicted about this range. I’m sure it was expensive when it was purchased. It is very small. I like the gas cook top (though I burned every grilled cheese I made for the first month). I don’t like the empty space above it.  I miss my old stainless steel, brand new appliances… but I’m getting used to it and I’m really trying to love this stove. I’m struggling trying to figure out how to dress up the space around it. The “hall” to the right of it is a fairly large open space.  We’ve put an Ikea island there for now and plan on putting some shelving above it… Does anyone else have one of these repro ranges? How did you style it? I’m not digging it’s location but it’s the only place that has a gas hook-up.

This house purchase was so stressful and seemed to go on for ages. I can’t remember if I mentioned that when we moved in the previous owner had left so many of their belongings behind – dishes were still in the cupboards, items still in the storage areas, and below our deck is absolutely full of old garbage. We had written a condition in the purchase agreement that the house was to be left empty and “broom” swept. When we received it there was broken glass all over the basement floor, and the front door lock had completely fallen out of the door (hah!). We were told on closing day, by our lawyers office that the previous owner was having a cleaning crew come in that morning, which obviously never happened. We were pretty annoyed to hear that the only recourse was small claims court to cover the cost of junk removal despite the fact that it was in our contract. Our lawyer advised us that it probably wasn’t worth our time pursue. Then just a week ago, I got a random call from our lawyer letting us know they had made an error in calculating our land transfer tax and we immediately owed $700. It was just that one last thing that pushed me over the dissatisfaction edge.

Overall, I was very happy with how the sale of our house went – we left our house mopped, clean and completely vacant, save for a bit of extra flooring and paint. The purchase on the other hand just left a bad taste in my mouth. I’m still happy with the house and am having a lot of fun working on it (dream come true), I always just have a hard time when people don’t follow through on things they say they would do. I always feel like I’m the nice guy who just let’s things slide, but end up with the short end of the stick. I keep reflecting back on how I could have prevented these things, but I guess that’s just the way things go sometimes!

A Podcast + Getting Personal

Uncategorized October 21, 2015
I get really nervous about the thought of actually talking to people, which is funny because I’m pretty much an open book. Not much is off limits with me… But once the initial jitters wear off, it can sometimes be hard to stop talking! A while back I had the opportunity to do an interview with Reyna Lay, for The Reyna Lay Designs Podcast. It was so much fun chatting with her, I could have gone on for hours! I’d love it if you had a listen to our discussion. I talk a bit about juggling business + baby, plans for the future, and some tips on sewing lingerie.  Reyna is also having a pattern give away and is offering a coupon code for my Pattern Shop… But you’ve got to visit her site for all of that info!
On the topic of Podcasts… Have I told you yet how obsessed I am with Podcasts? When Isabel was a few months old she was having some serious nap issues, so I would put her in the stroller or the carrier and I would walk her all around the city… To keep my very tired mind occupied I started listening to Podcasts. First, I got hooked on Skeptoid. I’m a bit of a science nerd and skeptic (but I also love the paranormal and Bigfoot), so I devoured every single episode. Then I binged on Skeptics Guide… Then onto Criminal, Quackcast, Stuff You Missed in History Class, Sawbones, Oh No Ross and Carrie (MY FAVOURITE! I LOVE THEM!), Limetown, Nightvale, Lore, Stuff Your Mother Never Told You, Grown Ups Read Things They Wrote as Kids… I am constantly listening.  If you follow me on twitter, you may know that I suffer from insomnia. Well, there’s a podcast for that. Ok, it doesn’t stop me from waking up at 2am, but Sleep With Me Podcast does actually get me to go to sleep most of the time (and even when it doesn’t, at least I get a good laugh). Anyone else listen to any of these? Podcasts have seriously saved my sanity. Being a mom involves a lot of not-exactly-exciting moments (I love you, Izzy). Podcasts are an excellent way to feel mentally stimulated while also tending to a drooling, biting, maniacal little human. I’m excited about Reyna’s Podcast, as there aren’t really a lot of sewing related podcasts.
Life as a whole has been extremely busy lately. Today is Isabel’s birthday (my little girl is one already!) and I’ve been planning a birthday and doing lots of crafting. We’ve been busy with lots of projects around the house, and business has been very good. To make life a little more challenging, we also decided to buy a house and sell ours, kind of impulsively. Things were going really smoothly at first, but we’ve run into a few bumps over the last few days that have me second guessing the whole thing…  I’m at that point where I’ve been going-going-going, and just reaching my breaking limit. As I’ve learned with our first foray into real estate,  there are a million things that can go wrong with a sale and purchase, so I’m trying to not count my chickens before they hatch.  But it’s hard.
One of the other things we managed to squeeze in was a family photoshoot. Dan surprised me for our anniversary by hiring a photographer to take some candid photos of us! It was such a nice surprise and I am so happy to have these momentos of this special time with Isabel. It really is true, the first year flies by. I saw a newborn baby while I was out with Isabel today, and I can hardly even remember what that was like. It’s like it goes by in the blink of an eye… now my girl is starting to walk, pointing at the dog and shouting “DOH!”, and giving big, wet kisses.  I want to give a big, heartfelt thanks to Naomi from Shutter Owl Photography for spending the afternoon with us and capturing us in all of our glory. Isn’t Oliver a ham? He loves to model.
Oliver is in the midst of “crazy pug” (if you have a pug you know exactly what I’m talking about).

Oliver strikes a pose.

My handsome man and beautiful daughter

My mini-me! The most important person in the world.

Planning for Spring…

Uncategorized March 11, 2013

You may have noticed I have put my shop on “vacation.” Unfortunately for me,  I am not laying on a beach somewhere warm and sunny, I am just trying to catch up on a backlog of orders.  My goal has been to deliver under 8 weeks, but to be honest, it’s more like 10 right now, which is a long time!   I am an impatient person, so I understand how annoying that must be for my customers!  I’ll probably reopen next Monday, and I do plan on having a sample sale at that time as well. Finally!

Yesterday Dan & I started talking about doing more planning for some changes around the house, which has gotten me excited about something again!  We have a list of things that have to be done and a list of things that we would like to do.

Our “Have To” list consists of fixing our chimney, and at the same time, seeing about having a gas fireplace insert installed into our wood burning fireplace.  Our chimney is currently on a bit of a perilous angle.  I am really excited about a gas fireplace.

Our “garage”, and I use that term loosely, is desperately in need of a bulldozer.  I’ve been a little afraid of even thinking about this project because the whole thing needs to be rebuilt.  Last night we looked at some prefabricated garages, and they are totally realistically priced for us! I was so happy.  Our “garage” really looks like it’s ready to fall down at any minute, so getting it fixed would be really wonderful.  Depending on the cost of the chimney, we might try to do it this summer.

Scary, huh?

I’m not sure if this is a “have” or a “like,” but our main entry way, stairway, and upper hall are all finished in this bizarre, tiki-style wood paneling   I actually don’t hate it. When people come here for the first time, they always walk right up to a wall, touch it, and say “wow… I’ve never seen paneling quite like this before.” I don’t know if they are just trying to hide their horror, or what… The problem I have with the paneling is there is virtually no insulation behind it.  I guess folks back in the day weren’t so concerned about their heating bills.  So, I would like to take it down and drywall.  The thing I dread is it is lathe and plaster underneath, which makes a real mess when you take it down… We discovered that when we changed our side door.

Our “High Gloss” Paneling

As for the likes, I want to give a go at painting our bathroom tile & harvest gold tub.  Anyone ever done this before? My parents have painted their tub, and it looks awesome, but I’m not sure about painting tile.  I’ve read a few blogs where people have done it. While it’s not the worst bathroom in the world, it’s still pretty ugly.  I also want to replace the vanity and re-tile the floor.

Harvest Gold Bathroom

My biggest “like” involves removing the wall between our kitchen & living room, adding a kitchen island for more counter and cupboard space, changing our counter tops (there are currently 2 styles of counter tops in our kitchen! oh the joys of purchasing a rental house…) and putting the dark wood flooring throughout the remainder of the main area of the house.

I’m still really happy with our house and I think out of all of the houses we looked at in our modest price range, we got the most value for this one.  It still has a some issues, but so far it hasn’t been anything we can’t handle!

Over the next few weeks Dan and I are also going to do some changing around on the main area of our house.  I currently have my sewing room set up on our dining room, which worked for a bit but now that I am working from home I really feel a need to have a space I can go into in the morning and leave in the evening.  So, we are going to make a combined sewing room / art studio that Dan and I can both use.  I hope to do that soon, because as hard as I try to keep my sewing area neat, it can be really challenging, and I find it really stressful staring at the mess.

So, I am very excited about the next few things we will be doing to the house.  It’s been really fun to see it go from a gross old house to something kind of cute, and it’s probably been one of the most fulfilling feelings, fixing it up ourselves.

Gardens!

Uncategorized May 23, 2012

I never, in my life, thought this house could look so neat and tidy.  Dan and I used to drive past this house on our way to work every day and I never gave it a second glance.  Now with some paint, new gardens, GRASS, and a new apple tree, it’s looking pretty darn good.

As a testament to how much Dan loves me, he dug through our very compacted gravel drive way so I could have a garden on the right side of our front stairs.  Previous to this, the gravel went right up to the stoop there.  Here’s a reminder of what our house looked like about 2 months ago:

Welcome to bores-ville!

My mom and I went out flower shopping on Saturday morning.  We each got a rhododendron, and I got a hydrangea, some veggie plants, and a bunch of annuals. We broke up some hostas and lilies from my mom’s  gardens and planted them here as well.  Dan and I also planted an apple tree at the front of our property! We have a crab apple tree in the back, so we just might get apples one of these days.

A Sunny Sunday Game of Fetch…

Uncategorized February 19, 2012

I love my dog so much. He is the most precious thing in the world to me. I love how his ears flap when he runs – this picture captures it perfectly!

Watching my dog play fetch is watching 100% Pure Joy in action.

I think I am back to work now…

Uncategorized February 2, 2012

Well, like most things, moving and fixing up our house took longer than expected, and I am sad to have completely missed the Valentines Day rush, treasuries, features, etc, etc… another year, I suppose!
However, we do pretty much have the house up and running. We’ve been living here for a full month now and it’s finally starting to feel like home. Everything is moved in, save for a few things stored at my parents house, curtains have been sewn, and I’m already planning paint colours for the exterior of our little barn-house.
Everyday, I walk down the stairs in utter amazement. I’m so proud of Dan and I, and so thankful for all of the work my Mom & Dad, cousins, uncles & aunts have put into our house over the last week. It felt like an old fashioned barn-raising here with all of my family over to help, everyone hurrying around finishing up projects. I am so grateful to have the family I have.
I’ve got my sewing machines all set up to get back to business this weekend. I am planning on retiring old designs, holding a sample sale, and listing a bunch of new things come spring. In the meantime, I am keeping Ohhh Lulu on vacation until I can get myself better organized. Plus, I’d like to give myself a break. I’ve done a lot over the last several months, between getting married and buying a house! 🙂
Though… I say that now, and I’m sure this weekend I’ll sew something up that I won’t be able to resist listing on Etsy!!!